High School Glossary

Teacher's Request: This paper is due on Tuesday.

Students' Translation: Of course you don't have to actually turn the paper in on Tuesday. I simply set that as an arbitrary date for my own benefit. Whenever you finish is fine. How about tomorrow. Or the next day. How about after the bell rings you ask to be excused so that you can go print out the paper (that is already a day late) in the library and then huff and puff when I hassle you about doing your work on your own time instead of mine. Or - maybe you didn't even get the initial work for the paper done because I only gave you two weeks to do it and you planned to get it all done on the Friday before the deadline but lo and behold you were sick that day and therefore couldn't collect your data in time to turn in the paper on Tuesday. And after all, the weatherman predicted snow on the due date so you can't possibly be expected to be held accountable for work that was due on a school day which may or may not have been cancelled per inclement weather.

Of course, I jest. I'm crazy about these kids. (Or maybe, I'm crazy BECAUSE of these kids . . . .hmm.)